she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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