so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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