Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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