he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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