my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
