if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
It's shark week go big or go home
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
There's even glitter on my cock...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
