your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
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