so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
