so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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