I want to stick my p in your. b.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
