to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We left the knife in your bed.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
