Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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