we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
