Sry I called you an 8
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize