She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
