Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
