I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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