i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
