Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
