Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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