Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
