? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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