Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize