saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
just come out here and I will go home with you...
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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