if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
me + whiskey = a bad person
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
