if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
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