U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
