they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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