Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
can u get pink eye on your cock?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
