I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
