You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Ladies don't puke and tell
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
