That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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