Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
