Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
you never un-have a 4some
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
