Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
