You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I don't want my vagina anymore.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
