Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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