It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
