i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
