So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize