You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
my poor anus
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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