...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
