so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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