Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
