This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize