can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
being pregnant is like rehab
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize