Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize