Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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