the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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