Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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