You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
